Netflix's "Dead To Me:" On Guilt, Grief, Friendship & Lov

I first discovered the Netflix show, Dead To Me, when my dear friend, Jessica, recommended it when it aired in 2019. Jessica and I became best friends when we were 14 and she went from home-schooling on her family farm to attending my small public school (she thrived and never looked back!). We acted in plays together, went on family vacations together, tons of sleepovers, visited each other at college and beyond, made crazy recordings, dated brothers once, spent every moment we could together. And for the next few decades, we shared almost daily phone calls as teens, to regular calls and letters as we made it through young-adulthood, to almost daily calls again, as we shared marriage and motherhood. We talked about anything and everything—relationships, society, philosophy, politics, families—and also cooking, cleaning hacks, books, tv. When I recommended the book Pachinko, she read it. When she recommended a recipe for a homemade ice cream cake, I made it. So when she recommended “Dead to Me,” I watched it. I remember her saying it was not like any other show she’d seen.

“Dead to Me” is a show about mistakes and consequences—and how you deal with both. It’s dark and funny. It’s tense and poignant. It’s a lot about guilt, but it’s also about motherhood and daughterhood. And at its core, it’s about friendship and love.

I’m actually a little shocked when I see that this show aired in May 2019 because Jessica was battling Stage 4 cancer at the time. She passed away 4 months later.

Shocked isn’t the right word.

Anyone who has lost a loved one knows that Grief kind of jumps up in your face and screams at you at any random moment it feels like.

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Giving Back: Spotlight on Barbershop Books

From February through April, my Giving Back Initiative will support an impactful and innovative organization called Barbershop Books. A few months back, I heard a Ted Radio Hour, which spurred me to do a bit of research after the show (not terribly uncommon for the Ted Radio Hour!). This episode, School of Life, was about exploring “life lessons that teach us far more than any textbook.” Part three featured Alvin Irby, an educator, author, comedian and founder of the intuitive-upon-reflection, brilliantly modeled organization that captured me in an instant. Barbershop Books’ mission is this:

“Help Black boys ages 4-8 to identify as readers by connecting fun books to a male-centered space and by involving Black men in boys' early reading experiences.”

So how does Barbershop Books do this?

Irby came up with his idea, while watching one of his first-grade students in the Bronx squirm impatiently at a local barbershop. Irby kept wishing he’d had a book to lend the boy, which naturally led to the thought, someone should put books for kids at the barbershop… This idea, coupled with Irby’s impressive background in education and leadership, transformed into his nationally recognized organization.

Barbershop Books offers early literacy training to barbers while placing engaging children’s books into barbershops. Formerly antsy boys can read funny books while hanging at the barbershop! This may sound simple, but the thought behind it is well-researched and effective—which is why it’s so exciting and promising. Reading is power and when there is a stark reading gap among race or gender (see # 2 below), this inequity can follow these individuals for the rest of their lives. Barbershop Books is making progress to close the reading inequity gap, and in so doing, empower these boys for the rest of their lives. Here’s how:

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Giving Back Update: Spotlight on WaterAid

Thank you for your support of my contributions to the worthwhile organization, WaterAid. I believe in my social responsibility to contribute to a more just, healthy, safe and joyful world. As part of my Giving Back Initiative, every time you have purchased a play, monologue or royalty November 2020 through January 2021, 25% of those profits have aided such programs as WaterAid describes below:

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Giving Back: Spotlight on WaterAid for November - January

As part of my Giving Back Initiative, for the months of November 2020 through January 2021, I will be donating 25% of my playwriting profits to WaterAid. I believe in the social contract of not only helping our neighbors, but also helping any in need, despite manmade borders, whenever we are given the power to do so. I believe in taking personal action by volunteering myself, but I also believe in supporting those who serve on the front-lines across the world when I cannot. This is an investment in humanity, of which we are all a part.

Because of this, I have chosen WaterAid as an organization to support with my playwriting profits for November 2020-January 2021. When you purchase a play, a monologue, or royalties during these months, you are nourishing your own theatrical endeavors and you are also helping provide clean water, hygiene and sanitation to the world’s poorest communities. Read more, from WaterAid, to learn about the water crisis in this world, and what WaterAid is doing to make a difference.

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Dramatic Halloween Read-Aloud from Chat-n-Read: Creepy Carrots by Aaron Reynolds, illustrated by Peter Brown

Of all the holidays, Halloween just might be the most dramatic! Anything can become spooky melodrama when you put on an eerie voice, add a bit of black-and-white illustration, and make inanimate objects start FOLLOWING YOU! Kids - enjoy this spooky and fun read-aloud from Chat-n-Read (one of my other adventures!) of Creepy Carrots written by Aaron Reynolds and illustrated by Peter Brown.

We’ll chat about what makes things creepy and then share the story of Jasper Rabbit and what happens to him when his favorite garden snack starts creeping him out! Make sure you stick around to the end, because it’s quite clever!

Now, say this in a spooky voice and wave your hands around all creepy-like: “Enjoooooooy!”

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Chat-n-Read Dramatic Reading of Children's Book, "A Pet for Fly Guy" by Tedd Arnold

In my latest Chat-n-Read episode, chat about having a pet and enjoy a fun read-aloud of "A Pet for Fly Guy" by Tedd Arnold.

How many of you would love to have a pet? Lots of hands in the air, right? I know I'd love to have a horse and a parrot and a cat and a dog and a guinea pig and a rabbit and...well...I don't know that I could all have all of those pets. But I bet we could all have a FLY for a pet! Hm...how does that sound? :) (CLICK FOR THE READ-ALOUD VIDEO AND MORE)

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Hallmark Christmas Movies Announced: Are You Ready? Plus Theater Actors join MFTV Christmas Magic

Okay. It’s still September. SEPTEMBER. But I have been seeing social media posts and hearing friends talk about putting up Christmas trees and lights extra early this year. Not like, November 25 early. I’m talking September 25 early! And really, in this very tense, anxiety-filled, unprecedented, relentless season of our lives, who can blame anyone for wanting to elongate a traditional feel-good season?

The Christmas season is cozy, cold but warm; it brings us hot chocolate, eggnog and peppermint, calming lights, early dark evenings, soothing music, colors everywhere amidst a landscape of mainly brown. It is comforting and familiar, and those are two things that we all crave—especially now when both feel a bit out of reach. And so…you know what also brings comfort and familiarity around that time of year, right? Hallmark Made-For-TV (MFTV) Christmas Movies! Keeping pace with the Christmas trees going up in NYC apartments, they’ve announced their Holiday Season already! You can check out Hallmark’s Countdown to Christmas line-up here. And don’t worry, Netflix and Amazon will have their own Cheesy Christmas Movies coming too (“A Royal Toddler Goes to Virtual Preschool” perhaps?), but I have to give props to the originator, Hallmark.

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Engulf The Evil Ashes: A dramatic monologue from the play, For My Silent Sisters by Tara Meddaugh

My full-length dramatic play, For My Silent Sisters, gives voice to four young people who struggle to escape the dark world of human trafficking. *Before I discuss the monologue and play, please note that while I write with great respect and care, this monologue contains references to human trafficking and violence and may not be suitable for all readers.* Please also note that while the play is fiction, there are many experiences, very similar to the ones I give voice to, which have happened to real people. No country is immune to this egregious crime. At the time I’m writing this, criminals are trafficking an estimated 25 million people worldwide. For more information on human trafficking in the USA, how to help or report, visit the Human Trafficking Hotline or Polaris.

For My Silent Sisters journeys how criminals use manipulation, lies, or force to commit this crime. But it mainly journeys how four teenagers survive within this world, hold onto hope, strength, friendship, and how they all eventually leave that world—one way or another.

Engulf the Evil Ashes is a monologue from Marta. Marta, an excellent student from a large family in Romania, sees her way to a brighter future by accepting a position as a translator in England. However, after leaving home with the job recruiter, she discovers the role she thought she would receive does not exist. Instead, she is taken to a “training facility” in the woods in Albania, a place where girls are “trained” for forced prostitution (enslavement), then sent to other countries to make money for their enslavers. While their situation is terrifying, Marta immediately bonds with a confident Romani girl, Tasaria. They share stories, looks, secrets; they become closer than sisters. Tasaria develops a plan for them to escape the facility, but when the moment comes, Marta does not follow her. Tasaria’s escape attempt fails and she is killed. Marta is devastated.

In this monologue, Engulf the Evil Ashes, Marta has been punished, by friendship association, for Tasaria’s escape attempt. She is placed in the ground, simulating being buried alive. Though grieving, her rage and determination give her strength, and Marta comes up with a plan for freedom. She hides sticks from the outdoors and brings them with her when she is placed in an isolated room inside. During the course of a few hours, she is able to start a fire and begin burning down the old wooden building. While the building goes up in flames and smoke, Marta only smells freedom.

This monologue is about 2.5 minutes long, suitable for a mature teenager or young adult looking to sink into a dramatic monologue. It is a moment of empowerment, a moment when a frightened and beaten-down person finds strength in righteous anger, a moment when she finds a powerful voice, not only in words, but in actions. A moment when she changes the fate for herself—and hundreds of other girls.

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New York Theatre Workshop Launching Youth Artistic Instigators Company for Teens

Through the injustices and crimes of 2020 (and, sadly, all these years before 2020), through a global pandemic, through ravaging fires and global warming, through a divisive presidency (and campaign), through economic, education and childcare crises - there are always people who rise up. Thank God for this, otherwise, we’d be crumpled in a depressed lump indefinitely. First and foremost, thank you to all the people, rising up in their own ways, all across the country and world. Humans do not give up.

Humans, do not give up.

Theater has a unique ability to bring a dramatic voice to current issues, allowing the audience to see bits of the world through the perspective of a character who may, or may not, be quite different from ourselves. Couple that with the voices of youth (they won’t be called “youth” for very long)—and see what inspiration unfolds. New York Theatre Workshop is launching “a new free after school program called Youth Artistic Instigators…”

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Art As Protest on The Show Up from Patreon

We all know art can be a powerful tool. Check our Friday’s 10am show surrounding the theme of “art as protest,” on The Show Up from Patreon:

The role of art in confronting important political and social issues is a long standing tradition. From Stonewall to Black Lives Matter, artists have long used their craft to push for change. Join us this Friday, June 26th at 10am PT as we connect with EbonyJanice and Thea Monyee´, Taina Asili and Kesha Bruce of Spirit House Art — all artists who use their vision today to fight for a better world tomorrow.

The Show Up is free and open to all, so invite your friends, sign up today and show up on Friday to meet these awesome creators who are pushing our world forward.

Petition for BIPOC Critics in New York Times's Theater/Culture Staff

Representation and voice in theater, and theater reviews, matter. Click here to sign this petition for the New York Times to include in their roster of theater critics representation of black, Indigenous and people of color.

“For many years, The New York Times has failed to add BIPOC theater critics to its staff. Works by BIPOC artists have been subjected to the white critical gaze that often fails to bring even a cursory understanding of the experiences that inform the works of BIPOC artists. As a result, any attempt to stray from white-centered narratives are either labeled as ‘radical,’ or dismissed as amateur attempts by yet unformed aesthetic practices. This critical gaslighting of BIPOC artists has shaped the choices of many theaters and institutions only too eager to please the tastes of The Times's critics. Many works by BIPOC theater artists have been prematurely killed by biased and racially insensitive reviews from white critics.

”The New York Times must have its own critical awakening. We live in a city where BIPOC artists have been working even before the Times first ran its presses. Its stubborn insistence in maintaining a roster of white critics denies BIPOC artists the right to be carefully considered and understood.
 “

~Ralph Pena

Juneteenth: In Solidarity - Black Lives Matter

Today is Juneteenth, freedom day, marking the ending of the crime of slavery in the United States on June 19, 1985. This is the date when Union solders landed in Texas with news that the war had ended and those who had been enslaved were no longer (note that this is over 2 years after President Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation).

“Juneteenth has never been a celebration of victory, or an acceptance of the way things are. It's a celebration of progress. It's an affirmation that despite the most painful parts of our history, change is possible––and there is still so much work to do.” - President Barack Obama

Both professionally and personally, I stand in solidarity with black women, men, children and people of color against overt, covert, systemic and all forms of racism in the country and world. I continue to evaluate my own assumptions, listen, learn and support. A notice from PBS recently said that our [USA] “country finds itself in a period of education and reckoning of the racism embedded in its birth.” What a painful, vile atrocity to have embedded in the birth of your nation—and to see unfolded in sickening unjust ways for hundreds of more years. How could there not be anger, hurt, turmoil, righteous indignation when this is felt or understood? But let us stay committed now, and always, to reckon with that history and its effects, and to create a strong shift from this history. Changes can occur on various levels through large movements as well as small interactions. This will go beyond our lifetime, but I think to the verse in Galatians 6:9 which I memorized as a child, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Do not give up. Black Lives Matter.

Honing your Acting skill: Monologues for actors under quarantine

For many of us during this global pandemic, our theaters are closed down, acting classes are held virtually and auditions are video or streaming-only. Theater is a communal art-form by nature, so without the physical community, this distancing can be counter-intuitive and disheartening. However, artists are also resilient and creative by nature, and it did not take long for theater folks to form groups where readings and performances were held online, and actors, in their own isolation, have dedicated unanticipated space to honing their craft during this time of furlough….

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Murder Mystery Game For Social Distancing

I believe wholeheartedly in the need for PLAY. Any age or station in life. It nourishes us, excites us, gives us joy, new experiences (this is one of the reasons why I love writing, directing and acting!). I love games, like Celebrity and Loaded Questions, to name a few. Games that make us interact, think, laugh, be silly or crazy or weird, and allow us chat between rounds or bring up funny stories. Murder Mystery parties have also been a staple since my parents introduced me to them when I was in college (yes, my parents! The same parents who introduced me to geocaching before hardly anyone even had a gps device!).

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Theater in a Time of a Global Pandemic

Many of us around the world are operating under “stay at home” measures, be they called “lockdowns,” “quarantines,” “PAUSE” or probably numerous other terms meant to convey what we need to do right now—which is, for most of us: stay at home. I’m going to first give a huge shout-out to all the essential workers in all the fields right now who are continuing to go to work outside of the home, many putting others’ needs before their own.

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

You are seen and noticed and appreciated!

Thank you!

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2019 Cheesy Rom-Com Christmas movies: It's never too early (or is it?)!

I’m a bit buried in planning two 12-hour road-trips next week, followed by family visits, lots of volunteering, parties, events, writing, theater—so Christmas is kind of sneaking up on me this year. It doesn’t help that Thanksgiving comes late in the month, as it seems everyone has observed. But tonight, I stopped in my leaf-raking tracks when I received this message from a friend:

“Just got an email from Netflix about ‘The Knight Before Christmas.’ I am so excited!”

My heart just did a little back flip.

Is there any better pre-Thanksgiving reminder that the Christmas season is ready to burst through the door?

I mean, come on, look at this write-up of the movie:

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Ferret Envy on Unknown Playwrights Monologue Monday

Okay, so I was beyond elated when I first read Ionesco’s La Cantatrice Chauve (the Bald Soprano) in 9th grade French Class, as it confirmed a name for the style of theater my teenage self had already been unknowingly writing in: Theater of the Absurd. It was weird, it was dark, it was funny. I loved the feeling of laughing then cringing, cringing then laughing, laughing while cringing. After I read through Ionesco at my school library, my teacher suggested I try Albee, and these two writers (perhaps along with the tv show, Northern Exposure) were important influences in my writing.

So huge thanks to Bryan for this nice write-up on his blog, Unknown Playwrights, about my monologue, Ferret Envy, including A through Z video performances of the monologue.

”Sometimes you see Ionesco‘s name thrown around with Theatre of the Absurd. Same deal with Albee. Nah, Meddaugh is where it’s at. Picture this: You are SO jealous of your friend’s ferret that you (probably) killed said ferret because…you want to be your friend’s ferret!!!! This is a fun, funny goofed-up piece of theatrical brilliance.”

Bryan, I am blushing that you can put me in a category with these writerly gentlemen. Thanks for the shout-out, and you can check out prolific playwright Bryan Stubbles’ work here.

Poppy: The Success of a Youtube Persona-life

So she's been around a couple of years, but when NPR interviews her, you know she's made it to some sort of new level. I'm talking about Poppy. That 20-something, eerie, but empathetic blonde who occasionally resembles a slightly southern Marilyn Monroe, but, like her eyebrows, has a darker undertone, and a satiric bite about the very idea of fame which has made her famous. So who is Poppy and why do I want to take the time and space to write about her?...

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Motherhood in Theatre Forums 2017: Breaking the Silence

If you're a parent in theatre, and have encountered some challenges or figured out some solutions to this ever-present balancing act of art and children, check out this important new advocacy group touching on this not-talked-about-enough subject...

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