FORBIDDEN IN THE ELF MANUAL
A monologue from GRINCHING 101
By Tara Meddaugh

About the play, GRINCHING 101:
Grinch professors, Sourpuss Fuddy Duddy and Killjoy Cactus Snarl, are pleased to find their Grinching 101 classroom filled with eager elf-students desiring to learn the art of becoming a grinch. However, the class of bright-eyed cheerful students are blatantly failing. Every. Single. Lesson. Are the elves really that dull? Are they actually trying? Or is there some other reason they’re all in this class…? And is there anything, like, anything at all, that maybe…just maybe… the grinches can learn from the sugar-loving, compliment-spewing elves?
For the complete play,
Grinching 101, click here.

About the monologue, Forbidden in the Elf Manual:
The Grinching 101 professors have expressed frustration in their inept class of elves and wonder why they are even enrolled in the course. Tootsie Frosted Cookie Stockings explains his reasoning for signing up for Grinching 101: It’s all about the videogames.

DETAILS:
Genre: Comedic/Children/Teen/Christmas
Running time: Approximately 1 minute
Cast: Male (or any gender)
Age range: Any age
Setting: A Grinching 101 Classroom at the North Pole
Time period: contemporary

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TOOTSIE FROSTED COOKIE STOCKINGS 

(clarifying name for the Grinching Professors who hate hearing the elves’ long ridiculous sugary names)

It’s Tootsie Frosted Cookie Stockings.

And the reason I came here today—the reason I thought I might actually be a bit of a grinch inside is that…well…I know this is going to terrify everyone, so brace yourself. But…

(ELVES lean in)

I hate making snowballs.

(ELVES gasp)

And sledding.

(ELVES gasp)

And frolicking in the snow at all really. I mostly just wanna play videogames. And not like, “Fill Santa’s Sleigh” videogames. I’ve—END OF EXCERPT
Click here for the free monologue, Forbidden in the Elf Manual. This monologue is free to download, but if you would like to support the playwright and her craft, you may do so below:

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 For the entire play, GRINCHING 101, from which this monologue comes, click below:

Grinching 101, a one-act Christmas Comedy
$7.99

In this 30-40 minute Christmas comedy for 16+ actors, Grinch professors, Sourpuss Fuddy Duddy and Killjoy Cactus Snarl, are pleased to find their Grinching 101 classroom filled with eager elf-students desiring to learn the art of becoming a grinch. However, the class of bright-eyed cheerful students are blatantly failing. Every. Single. Lesson. Can these grinching professors get the class of chipper elves to learn anything about becoming a good grinch? And perhaps along the way, can the grinching professors can learn something from the elves?

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