Jingle Bell Hater: A New Christmas Comedic Monologue

in ,

Okay, if you had fun playing Tootsie Frosted Cookie Stockings and you want to play another Christmas Elf with a ridiculous Christmas-Elf name, you’re in luck! Check out Fluffy McWaffles Tart’s monologue here, JINGLE BELL HATER, from my new one-act Christmas comedy, Grinching 101. In this monologue, Fluffy McWaffles Tart explains his reasoning for signing up for the Grinching 101 seminar: It has to do with those “saccharine-stevia-monk-fruit-sugar-free” jingle bells! And brownies. And eggnog. It all comes back to eggnog…

This monologue runs about 1.5 minutes, is suitable for any gender actor, child, teen (or adult playing a young elf). You can find the play, Grinching 101, from which it comes, here. Enjoy and excerpt below:

Read More

New Comedic Christmas Monologue: Purring Ironically

in ,

So the issue of “do you dress up your cat” is a hot button topic for pet-people! Personally, my cat “dresses up” once a year in a burrito cape for about 30 seconds so I can snap a Halloween photo of her, and then, I take it off and we’re done. Not that she seems to care if the cape is on or off, to be honest! Well, in this new Christmas monologue, Violet definitely has strong opinions about her kitty wearing something.

When Violet arrives home from work, she’s horrified to see her dignified cat, Luna, dressed up in a holiday “ugly sweater” and matching Christmas-light tiara. As she tries to figure out who might have done this cheesy costuming to her precious kitty, and why (hint: Her boyfriend, Fred, is none too pleased Violet refuses to wear matching snowman sweaters, even though he knows she’s not sarcastic enough to pull it off!), she tries to take off the cat’s sweater. But Luna doesn’t seem to want to take it off… In fact, Luna seems to be liking it. Licking it. Even purring at it. Can Violet accept it if her couture kitty is now preferring Ugly Sweaters?

Read More

New Christmas Comedic Monologue: Forbidden in the Elf Manual

in ,

Okay, who wants to play a character named Tootsie Frosted Cooking Stockings? Here’s your chance with this new Christmas monologue, Forbidden in the Elf Manual, from my play, GRINCHING 101. In the play, Tootsie Frosted Cooking Stockings (let’s keep saying the whole name over and over!) is enrolled in a Grinching class for beginners and is pretty much failing every lesson.

In the monologue, Tootsie Frosted Cooking Stockings reveals to fellow classmates and grinching professors the reason he signed up for this class. (Hint: It’s all about the videogames.)

This monologue runs about 1 minute, is suitable for any gender actor, child, teen (or adult playing a young elf). You can find the play, Grinching 101, from which it comes, here. Enjoy and excerpt below:

Read More

New Christmas Comedy One-Act Play for a Large Cast: Christmas Grumping 101

in ,

If you’re looking for a one-act Christmas play for a large cast, check out my new comedy, GRINCHING 101:

Christmas Grumping professors, Sourpuss Fuddy Duddy and Killjoy Cactus Snarl, are pleased to find their classroom filled with eager elf-students desiring to learn the art of becoming a Christmas grump. However, the class of bright-eyed cheerful students are blatantly failing. Every. Single. Lesson. Are the elves really that dull? Are they actually trying? Or is there some other reason they’re all in this class…? And is there anything, like, anything at all, that maybe…just maybe… the Grumping professors can learn from the sugar-loving, compliment-spewing elves?

Christmas Grumping 101 is great for actors of any age - children, tweens, teens, adults, and Theater for Young Audiences. There are 16 character roles and an unlimited number of ensemble elves, who have unison lines and actions; no matter how many people you’re looking to cast, they have a place here! All actors are on stage for the entire play. While some roles have gender pronouns mentioned, they are all appropriate for any gender casting and directors have permission to change gender pronouns to fit casting.

Read More

Christmas and Holiday Rom-Coms - Here We Go!

in

Whaaaa? Did I miss 3+ weeks of Hallmark Holiday Rom-Coms because I was too focused on Halloween and, like, the rest of regular Fall life? Apparently! YIKES! Hallmark started rolling out its 2023 snow-filled holiday romcoms in mid-October this year (maybe that’s normal and I’m always behind?). I should have been more clued in, because people have been getting my Christmas monologues for months now. I love it! YES! Christmas theater and movies are here!

(And if you want to try your own hand at a holiday romcom, check out my “HOW TO WRITE A CHEESY HALLMARK CHRISTMAS ROMCOM.”
btw—I totally embrace “cheesy” for Christmas romcoms!)

So what can you expect from Hallmark this holiday season? From a planetarium to to an aquarium, fashion to photography, travel around the world (France, Scotland, Norway, Germany, England and more) and of course, a bit of time travel, a time loop, a magic pen and there’s gotta be at least a little bit o’ royalty — and loooots of stuff in between, you’ll get that predictable jingle-bell cozy atmosphere Hallmark is known for. Hallmark isn’t exactly known for their diverse casting of leading-ladies (have you seen the meme-calendar of blonde-haired, fair-skinned leading ladies from Christmases past?), but this year, they have some romcoms with different hair colors, skin tones, at least one different body shape, one romcom of two leading ladies who fall in love, and one Hanukkah romcom.

Read More

Great Small Cast Plays

in

Large cast plays give good range and offer a way to get lots of actors involved. But there are many reasons why you might be looking for a small cast play, as well. Your budget may not be able to afford to pay a large cast or costuming; you may not have the sheer number of people needed for a large cast; you may want to pair small-cast one-acts together (easier for scheduling rehearsals) or your actors are all looking to have meaty roles, without the small side roles you may find in large cast. Check out these plays with small casts, all which have 2-5 actors. Scroll through and click on the play covers for more details, or check out the summaries below.

Read More

New Kids' Dramatic and Comedic Halloween Monologue: “Boringest. Ghost. Ever.”

in

Written and delivered today, on Halloween, is my brand new (as in, an hour old!) monologue, Boringest. Ghost. Ever. This monologue is great for kids, even the young ones (ages 4+)! Children can play with the dramatic and comedic elements of this monologue and deliver a funny, and even a little spooky (but still family-friendly), performance! It’s a good length for kids, running about 1 minute and is suitable for any gender.

In the monologue, Ayla is frustrated that her middle-of-the-night visitor won’t play with her, won’t talk until the wee hours of the night with her, and won’t even tell her what her name is! Instead, this girl in the odd dress just keeps…well…standing there. Staring at Ayla. Being the boringest ghost she’s ever seen.

Read More

Halloween Monologues Great for Kids

in , , , , , ,

Give your kids some fun, family-friendly monologues great for Halloween! All of these are appropriate for any gender performer.

Read More

A Screenplay for Ada Lovelace Day: Thy Young Blue Eyes

Did you know today was Ada Lovelace Day? I didn’t either! But I should, because, did you also know I wrote a screenplay, called THY YOUNG BLUE EYES, about Ada Lovelace (which won a Sloan Fellowship)? I was alerted to this special day when I noticed an image in my laptop’s search bar this morning that looked kind of like my Facebook avatar mixed with Princess Leia, shaking her hands together in the air as in victory. I clicked on it and, behold: that’s not Princess Leia/Avatar Tara celebrating after running a marathon. It’s Ada Lovelace! Okay…and WHO is Ada Lovelace? And what is this movie I wrote about her?

Read More

Production Photos of Into the Violet

Don’t y’all love when you get production photos back? It’s like a mini-childhood-birthday-morning clicking on that gallery link. My new one-act play, INTO THE VIOLET, recently had a local production I was thrilled to be involved in, and I just got to see the photos (credit to JCP Images). This absurdist dark comedy is about two fairies who are trapped in a jar behind a waterfall. Nathan Flower created such a gorgeous, haunting, absurdly funny, tragically beautiful world directing this piece, and Emily Aronoff and Missy Flower were just brilliant as the two trapped fairies. Click to read a free excerpt, get the whole play, or learn more about the play (it’s about 15-20 minutes for 2 actors, teen-adult). Enjoy the gallery below! And hey—gotta include one photo featuring…the gnome. Yup. THE GNOME. (And always feel free to send me your production photos of my plays or monologues. I love to see!)

CLICK below for more-

Read More

New dark monologue: "My Motherhood," from the play, Knocking Louder

in

As Halloween rolls around, we’re all looking to add some more dark, creepy monologues to the roster. Here’s a newly released monologue, My Motherhood, from my absurdist dark comedy, Knocking Louder, that fits the chilling bill. In this 1-2 minute long monologue, Carol recalls the early stages of betrayal her younger sister displayed toward her… And how it’s all led to this moment: when Carol perceives Lilah is trying to take away the baby placed in Carol’s care. But there is no way Carol would ever let that happen. Nope. Nothing will stand in her way of motherhood.

My Motherhood is creepily fun and dramatic. A little weird, a little funny, a little sinister, a lot mean—while also tinged with hurt, bitterness and defensiveness - but also strength and resolve. Carol’s not the “good guy” of this play, but her intentions are not necessarily bad. Knocking Louder is a 3-person play which is absurdly funny, but also dark and tragic (also a good choice for some thrilling Halloween theater!). While absurd, it still touches on important political and social themes, which allow for discussion and reflection.

Read More

What Happened at the Mud Puddle Included in “9 Streamable Plays (plus a Musical) for Middle School Audiences”

While hopefully most performances are able to be in-person these days, sometimes it’s nice to have a few streamable options for performers. Thanks to On the Stage (OTS) for including my tween/teen play, WHAT HAPPENED AT THE MUD PUDDLE, in their list of 9 Streamable Plays (plus a Musical!) for Middle School Audiences.

WHAT HAPPENED AT THE MUD PUDDLE includes a good number of monologues, which translate well to streaming, but also are great for actors looking to practice in classes, with coaches or for self-study, as well as to use for auditions, showcases or even to perform, as some of these monologues can work standing alone. Check out a free excerpt and the play here, published by YouthPLAYS.

Read More

"There Once Were Two Clouds in the Sky" wins Bradford Gromelski Jury Award

in , ,

I’m so honored and happy to share that my new one-act play, THERE ONCE WERE TWO CLOUDS IN THE SKY, recently received the Bradford Gromelski Jury Award from Fusion Theatre, landing the highest score out of 700+ plays submitted from 40 states and 9 countries!

THERE ONCE WERE TWO CLOUDS IN THE SKY is a 2-person comedy/drama about two clouds trying to find meaning in their brief lives before they dissipate forever. When one proposes a risky way to solve their dilemma, they have to decide, together, if it’s worth it. It is suitable for any gender and any age. You can find the play and an excerpt here.

Fusion Theatre, in Albuquerque, NM has grown to establish one of the premier ten-minute play festivals in the country, called THE SEVEN…(click below to read more)

Read More

Plays for Shark Week!

in

Yes, it’s Shark Week, everyone! That means we’re going to celebrate those often-feared (tiger sharks are not very choosy with their prey!), sometimes cute (those adorable baby hammerheads??) creatures of the sea! And of course, why not pair your documentary-watching, shark-drink sipping experience with some theater, right?

Here are two shark-friendly theater pieces for you to enjoy this Shark Week (or really, any week of the year!), I am a Shark (a monologue) and The Shipwreck Solution (a one-act play).

Read More

Into the Violet: New one-act absurdist dark comedy for 2 actors - now available!

Lola and Nadine had lived a blessed and carefree fairy life, until a child trapped them in a glass jar in the woods and never returned. While Lola gives in to this life of despondency, Nadine tries to give her hope that they might, someday, fly outside their glass prison once again. But as the gravity of their situation becomes unbearable, and the line between reality and fantasy becomes malleable, they must find some way to create the escape they desperately need. INTO THE VIOLET is a dark comedy about hope and despair, deception and reality, and how connection to others may be the only way to survive the unthinkable.

Read More

Ten (10) Great Plays with Animals as Characters

in

Have you ever wanted to play a rabbit? Or a raven? Or a bear? Here’s your chance because in these ten (10) plays, all animal characters not only talk, but they have strong, interesting, fun acting roles to boot! The plays may feature animals but don’t assume they’re written for children (although younger audiences may enjoy too); they are complex, often with dark humor, high stakes, and poignant connections to each other. The plays range from absurd to dark comedy to drama-comedy (and yes, there are a couple for young performers/audiences!). There is so much room for creativity in directing, designing and acting and they’re enjoyable for audiences to watch and discuss. From a grieving raccoon to ostracized seagulls to frogs stuck in a tank, check out these ten (10) humanly relatable plays all featuring animals as the leading characters!

Read More